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2023 Game Of The Year Deathmatch: Final Fantasy XVI vs Cyberpunk 2077: Phantom Liberty

Welcome to our first human-on-human match!

Aftermath / Starline

The weekend was but a brief respite for our gladiators, as a new week--a new year, even--brings fresh mettle to be tested.

Last week we saw Pinocchio obliterate Elephant Mario in a walkover. Tonight's bout may be more evenly-matched, if only because this is the first time in the whole tournament that two human (well, close enough) beings have faced off.

If you're just joining us, or need a refresher after the weekend, here are the rules: there are 16 games in the mix for Game of the Year 2023. We're pitting them against each other in a knockout tournament. But we're not pitting the games themselves against each other; instead, we're selecting a Champion from in or around each game and having them duke it out in the arena in hand-to-hand (or weapon-to-weapon, or hand-to-weapon) combat. The winner, decided via a schoolyard "would Batman beat Superman" style debate, moves on. The loser does not. Here's how things stand after four bouts:

And now, to introduce our Champions for this evening's entertainment. Representing the Xbox 360 Era School Of Visual Design Presents: Final Fantasy XVI is protagonist Clive Rosfield, while fighting for the honour of Cyberpunk 2077: Phantom Liberty: World's Most Expensive Do-Over will be the actor Idris Elba.

Three, two, one...LET'S GO:

Nathan: Everyone thinks Clive's voice actor, Ben Starr, is hot, but they also think Idris Elba is hot. Have a feeling this is gonna be a close one.

Riley: Maybe it can just be a makeout contest?

Nathan: I'm not opposed to this!

Riley: Then WE'RE the winners.

Nathan: But how does one win a makeout contest?

Chris: Clive is hotter on principal because Idris Elba keeps getting cast in bad stuff.

His weakness is his agent.

Luke: Ben Starr was never the star of an NBA 2K storyline, which definitely counts in his favour.

Chris: I generally think an Eikon is stronger than any theoretical Sandevistan, but I admit that is a matter of debate.

Riley: I'm voting Idris Elba.

Gita: Clive can’t figure out if slavery is good or bad I’m giving this to Idris who isn’t a coward.

Luke: I'm going with Idris because, with the makeout contest ending in a tie, it comes down to a walk-off, and he's the best-dressed video game man of 2023.

Chris: True on both counts, also that jacket is incredible.

WINNER: IDRIS ELBA

Idris wins! Tune in tomorrow to see who he'll face in the quarter finals: it'll be the winner of the match between Armored Core VI and Hogwart's Legacy.

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